Top Picks

     Photo Credit: Patrice Patrick

     Well, it's about to be July. Can you believe that mess?! And I haven't had a date since...well, yeah, you know. BUT, I do have some amazing people in my life that I love.

     I've profiled a few of these folks on my Facebook page, and I figured now would be a good time to tell you why they are my top picks for the month, starting with Lindsay Coleman.

     You may know Lindsay Coleman as the amazing artist, jewelry maker, and photographer of some of my artistic and eccentric profile pictures and other photo albums.

     But mostly, I know Lindsay Coleman as someone who presses past the walls of shyness to express her true being and freedom in her art. She strives to create something pure and sweet and right.

     And if you ever have the pleasure of being photographed by her, it's like spending the day with a best friend who allows you to be completely yourself without being judged.

     I've known Lindsay for years and years. I've had the privilege of watching her grow from the latter part of her adolescence to her young adulthood and womanhood.

     She makes me proud the most when she creates and speaks through her art on behalf of you and I. My prayer for you Lindsay Coleman, is that you would never stop speaking--never stop speaking.

     Next on my June Top Pick List, to be blogged about....Margot Carlson...

Wisdom's Knocking:

Artists often express those things that mere words fail to wrap around.

Well Then...

     

     Just when you think your heart is despondent. Perhaps not in the most passionate of states, something triggers the dammed up emotions of the past, and something tender begins to erupt.

     It feels good to be alive. But it hurts to hurt. This is a little and passing boo boo. But I realize more than ever my heart is truly a treasure.

Wisdom's Knocking:

"There's power in them rolling hills, come on

You're a prize possession, not everybody's worthy

Only reason I know, cuz I headed down that road

And it'd be a shame for you not to have your own glow, come." -- Jill Scott

Keen

    

     I'm still loving the NBC show, "The Voice". I'm currently on a DVR marathon. I'm finishing up the entire season in one sitting. But mostly, I've been the most surprised at how much I've loved the "Coaches".

     I didn't expect the "Coaches" to be the hit of the show for me, but they totally are. Blake Shelton never ceases to crack me up. And my baby crush on Adam Levine has now become full grown. Mostly, I never knew that Adam could appear to be so heartfelt, sweet, and articulate.

Wisdom's Knocking:

Just when you think you know someone...Everyone is full of surprises.

Probably Not

   Photo Credit: Ashley Johnson  

     Last week was an amazing work week for me. I managed an amazing team of about 10 folks in my department, to help execute a successful backstage experience for one of the top award shows in the world. But in my team, one of those folks working for me, kept asking,"Am I doing a good job? I'm doing a good job, right...Right?" This sort of blatant insecurity doesn't sit well with me in a professional work environment.

     Instead, I wish that these folks would simply take the approach of observing, asking pertinent questions, listening intently, and simply jumping in anytime there's a task at hand without me having to hold their hand or prod them to do it. Hesitancy in many arenas will get you killed. And in my line of work, if you are not able to execute something within a specific time frame and to the best of your ability, your job and reputation will be at stake.

     Now, I'm not a completely horrific task master, but I do have high expectations for those that join me and my team for the line of work that I do. At the same time, I  also exercise grace. I understand that being thrown into a pool and not being able to swim may be a bit stressful to say the least. But trying to lean in on my good graces through perceived favoritism, will get you know where with me. I simply want to see how you work, your initiative and how well you work within a team.

     I truly enjoy what I get to do, regarding my vocation. Mostly because it involves a sense of community. A majority of the folks that I work with know how to play well with others along with working their butts off.

     So if you're doing a good job, you won't have to ask if you are. Does that make sense? So, if you have to ask if you're doing a good job, you're probably not...

     Because if you aren't doing a good job, either you'll be told or not hired. But if you are doing a good job, you'll be commended and promoted without fishing for a compliment through your own insecurities.

Wisdom's Knocking:

Do little things with great love.

But It's You

Photo Credit: Lindsay Coleman

     So sometimes, when I start surfing the web or getting ready to write a blog post, I like to hear noise in the background, so I'll just let the TV stay on a random channel while I do other things. 9 times out of 10, I land on some awful reality show that somehow hooks me.

     Tonight's special attraction is "Basketball Wives". I know you know what I'm talking about. And what the heck! Tammi from the "Real World" season 2 is on this show?  I can't believe season 2 of the "Real World" was 17 years ago. But I digress.

     Anyhow, the episode that played in the background while I thought of my next blog, was with the "character", Jennifer being set up on a blind double date. Meaning she was with her good friend and her friend's husband while waiting to have a nice dinner double date.

     Nevertheless, she was extremely nervous and anxious. And when her handsome date arrived, she was even more fidgety. Her fidgetiness made me nervous just watching her. And she kept saying in the scene, "This is all so awkward...so uncomfortable...I haven't been in the dating scene in years...This is so awkward."

     But looking at the other folks in the scene, no one else seemed uncomfortable--just Jennifer. Making me think...that it wasn't really an awkward situation, it was just her.

     How many times do we sabotage ourselves? Sometimes we're carrying a lot more baggage than we think, and we're so concerned with fitting in and not stepping on toes that we ourselves forget to breathe. And somehow along the way, we've forgotten that we already belong.

     Don't let this life's journey be about gaining someones approval and consideration, but let it be about resting in the truth that you are already loved, already accepted, and that you already belong.

    So the next time you're in an awkward situation--just step back for a second and reevaluate why you think it's awkward. It may not be the situation, it may just be you.

Wisdom's Knocking:

Allow yourself to get comfortable in your own skin: Appreciate and love your quirks, without being threatened by someone else's beauty and uniqueness.

Idris Elba

     Insert dazed and awe look here.

     I love my life. Many of you know that I work in the entertainment industry. But that's not the highlight of this particular post. The highlight comes with the phenomenon of that ever so present six degrees of separation.

     I've mentioned this a few times in my blog. The ability to be connected to almost anyone in the world through a chain friendships: Susie and John are indirectly connected, because Susie knows Jules who knows Bob, who knows Jimmy, who knows Sharonda, who knows Jacob and who's brother is John.

     There it is. Susie is somehow connected to this stranger John, although they might not have ever met.

     Well, I had a mega 2-day crush on this little frail looking actor named Idris Elba only to find out today, that a good friend of mine is actually friends with him and happened to communicate with him yesterday.

     Of course.

     And that my friends, is the phenomenon of six degrees of separation. You never know who knows who. Until of course, the right time. And many times the degrees of separation are far less than six. Life is funny like that.

     And now I bet your wondering what I'm going to do with my Idris crush...Well, I'll just let you wonder...

Wisdom's Knocking:

Trying to reach a dream? You're far more connected than you think. 

Leave Dem Draws

Photo Credit: Ashley Johnson

     Yes. I went there.

     But only because Enrique did. He was the sweet, 5 foot, 60-something year old Filipino man, who happened to be my cashier today at a oddly-named discount clothing store.

     He started ringing up my clothes, one by one. There was a shirt, and then another shirt. We both laughed about the previous customers and how they were about to get on his case because he was taking so long; but for some reason, he was the store's only cashier. So people would have to wait. He joked about how they wanted to beat him up, because everything was taking so long. I was in no rush. I laughed along with him.

     And then, Enrique, said, with a thick accent "Yeah, you know the Victoria's--People spend too much money on that fancy stuff." And without even thinking, I said, "Yeah, I know--I can't afford to do all that." What. What is coming out of my mouth right now?

     And then Enrique says, "Nobody keeps that stuff on anyway. Men just want it off." I couldn't hold it in. I just started busting up laughing. "Only a few people want you to dance around in it, but then it's over."

Wisdom's Knocking:

Don't major in the minors and minor in the majors.

Does My Voice Sound Like a Pinky Ring?

     Photo Credit: Yajaira Reynolds

     I have no idea what that means. But anyway.

     Does it weird you out to hear your own voice on a voicemail message or recording?

     Exactly. It's like, "Do I really sound like that??" Ew.

    Obviously the extreme difference in sound perception is coming from the fact that you are not just hearing your voice with your inner outer, when it's played back to you. It's just straight outer ear picking up the vibrations.

     Why is it, that I sound so much better in my own inner ear, than my outer ear? I bet a scientist could tell me. But until he shows up, I'll just accept this phenomenon and try to minimize my stank face when I accidentally hear my own voice played back to me.

Wisdom's Knocking:

Be open to the fact that your self-perception may not always be correct.

Hot Pink & Gray

   Photo Credit: Ashley Johnson  

     That's how I feel sometimes. My most comfortable stance would be to blend in the background, to not cause a fuss or ripple. But then there's that other unpredictable side to my being. It's the loud and sassy part of me that wants to act like a free bird. No. More like a wild peacock.

     Some of the definite perks to getting older: Caring less about offending people and more about resting and being comfortable in your own skin. It's so lovely.

     Leaving my twenties behind was a quiet occasion. But entering this new phase of my life is already like a parade.

     It's true, discoveries are made every day. But some discoveries just make more sense when you get older.

Wisdom's Knocking:

Don't let the years just pass you by, acquire wisdom along the way.

In The Mood for Christopher Cross

     

Photo Credit: Daniella Hovsepian

     It's always amazing to me the musical themes that I pick up on in the different seasons of my life.  It's like, at any given time, I gravitate towards a specific music genre or performer, and it becomes an anthem of sorts. Beyond becoming an anthem, these songs act like sugar. And I'm immediately addicted. How and why that happens, I have no clue. But it honestly feels as if everything in the universe has aligned ever so perfectly in the harmonies of these specific songs. 

     The two genres that are completely rocking my world right now are late 1960s Doo Wop and anything Christopher Cross. I know, it's crazy. That's how I do it. But somehow that combination is the language of my heart in this particular season of life. I think my music choices in this special season, are quite comical, calming, romantic, hopeful, and nostalgic. Which is, of course, very fitting for me.

Wisdom's Knocking:

"If You get caught between the Moon and New York City

The best that you can do...

The best that you can do is fall in love." -- Christopher Cross

Surprised & Cancelled

     Ugh. I just found out that one of the shows I actually loved to watch and DVR'd regularly was cancelled back in the fall of 2010.

    Mind you, I fall in love with the most random of shows, but this show seemed to be mainstream enough to last a few more seasons. But after four seasons, this show was snuffed out, leaving us fans without a true series finale. Wack.

     There are special ingredients that get me hooked on a particular television show. Writing is key and of course a vibrant ensemble cast. Mix in a little bit of cinemagic and great comedy and I'm yours.

     The show that did all of that for me, was a short lived sitcom, featuring Jordana Spiro, and an amazing group of comedians and actors, titled, "My Boys" on TBS. I somehow connected strongly with Jordana's character, "P.J. Franklin", for a variety of reason, of which I might explore further in future blog posts.

     But now, I'm relegated to Netflixing (Or buying) my now deceased sitcom to try and relive those funny and honest moments and story lines, as if they were brand new. So sad.

Wisdom's Knocking:

Enjoy it while it lasts.

Soft Giants

     Photo Credit: Joel Stephens

     It feels good to not have a crush on someone. Wait. Let me start that sentence again. It feels good to not have a crush on someone who isn't a jerk. Okay. Let me try that again. It feels good to have a crush on someone and have complete peace. Did you see all the grammar trickery I just tried to pulled on you right now?

     Needless to say, I've been looking at the character of the men folk around me. You know my recent post about Gentlemen? It was inspired by several men in my life. But there's one in particular that I'm paying close attention to. I'm just watchin'. I'm just peepin'. Nothing  major. You don't have to text me just yet. But it is June. And I think someone may want to ask me out on a date before this month is through...

Wisdom's Knocking:

While others may get excited about the misleading shine of a cubic zirconia, remember to pay attention to the diamond in the rough.

Super and Strong

Super 8

     Yesterday, I saw "Super 8", and today, I finally saw "Thor". Needless to say, I'm in an interesting state of mind as a result of watching these two epic themed story lines played out before my eyes--with brilliant sound, I might add.

     The timing involving me seeing these movies was pretty much perfect. The themes and tones of both movies matched my current life's predicament: "How to make good on one's destiny when the road you thought you were going to travel somehow disappears..." 

     "Super 8" had the heart of my journey, while "Thor" pushed me and challenged me to put my heart to action.

Thor

     A couple blog posts back ("Blur, Blur, Focus."), I wrote about my frustration with finding vocational focus at this point in my life. I'm not so much hungry for a career as I am in pouring out my creativity into a funnel for use. But perhaps that looks like an actual career. Of which I'm realizing I don't have to be afraid 

     The scary part for me doesn't rest in having a lack of success. But in the fact that there are now so many open doors for me, that any door I choose could be a winner. So which door do I choose? Oddly enough, the choice is mine. And that reality is extremely liberating and down right terrifying.

     God has been so gracious to me thus far. Why would I begin to see an end to such grace, while stepping out into the unknown.

     And what is in your heart to do, Patrice? I have been asked that question almost countless times this year. It's June, and focus is juuuuust beginning to form a picture for me to grasp.

     I'm ready again for adventure. My heart for storytelling through the medium of film is slowly being awakened in me, like a large giant. My heart for the artists behind those stories that we love also move me, perhaps into the realm of talent managing, but as I type that last sentence, I know managing artists would not suffice the lighthouse signal beaming within me to tell stories amidst a community of other artists.

     I've made a promise to myself this year: That I would tell myself stories everyday. I wanted to practice telling my stories, from my own heart, for my own heart. And of course, I wanted to see if anyone else would listen and relate to my silly little stories. That's how this blog transformed into what it is now.

     As much as I love variety in my life and fear getting locked into one vocation or career that may shut out all other options. In my heart of hearts, I know that my heart's true and strong passion will fuel energy and invite open doors to those underlying passions as well.

     So now, there are new steps to take...

Wisdom's Knocking:

Don't wait to do what you love, start doing it now.

Gentlemen, Take Note

Photo Credit: Evan Kaufmann

     I have a group of select guy friends that truly know how to treat a lady. And the wonderful thing is, you don't have to date them to get the royal treatment.

Yes, you can open the door for me.

     See, when I get around this particular group of guys, I know that I never have to worry about having money on me, because they always take care of everything.

Yes, you can carry my heavy bags for me.

     With this particular group of guys, I never have to worry about a door slamming in my face, because they are the first to open the door and the last to go through.

Yes, you can intently listen to me as I share the concerns of my heart.

     And yes, these fellas even remember to walk closest to the street while we stroll down the sidewalk.

Yes, you can beat someone up on my behalf if my safety is threatened.

     As you can see, I always get taken care of with this particular group of guys. I honestly feel as though I want for nothing. It's an amazing feeling.

     It's not a notion of me perceiving myself as a weakling or less than in the company of such men. On the contrary, it's simply the language of being cherished and considered and honored in recognizable and tangible ways, yes even as a friend.

     There are so many different scenarios in which we as females get dissed on a daily basis--Or hollered at from a street corner. It's just so refreshing to be treated with love, respect, and honor.

     Once the Gentlemen Gene develops (Sometimes by subtle female influence...) and truly takes root, becoming ingrained in a guy, it's a beautiful, beautiful thing.

     And for the ladies, I hope you are around to enjoy the fruit of such maturity in your male friendships. Every girl deserves to be treated like a jewel.  Don't let the nice guys in your life finish last. Know that there is big potential there. And I hope you'll be around to see it fully develop.

And yes, a true Gentleman has swagger. And isn't afraid to use it.

Wisdom's Knocking:

All men are not dogs.

Love Is and Time Was and Thick as Thieves

     I've been blessed to have some amazing friends in my life, but one friend in particular has loved me in my most awkward stages of life.

     We met in junior high, but became besties in high school. And she is one of my closest friends to date. She is truly like a sister to me and understands my "artist" tendencies and personality.

     Our friendship is just so comfortable, effortless, and life giving.

     And now, my sister-friend is a wife and a mother, and yet her identity and heart transcends all of those titles. Being in friendship with her and seeing how she walks out the "dailies" (Day to day life), is nothing short of witnessing a miracle and the kindness of God.

     We all need to gain history with just one person, with just one friend that knows us and gets us. Someone who can stand us when we're not cool and don't have it all together. Someone that can teach us a thing or two about humility.

     A friend that will brag about you to their friends and just sit with you in the silence. Maria is definitely that friend to me.

Wisdom's Knocking:

Take the time to allow someone into your life. It may prove far more meaningful tomorrow than today.

You Will Have Your Chance To Shine

      Photo Credit: Joel Stephens

     It's coming. Everyone always gets at least one.

   At least one moment where your heart's ultimate desire meets with incredible divinely orchestrated opportunity.

     But more importantly. Will you be ready? I'm serious.

   A couple year's back, a well-known television director that I greatly admire, asked me that very question. With such assurance, he looked me dead in my eyes, and told me, "You will have your chance to shine. Will you sink or swim? Will you have been prepared? Will you be ready??"

   Whoa. How does one prepare for such a weighty divine appointment? 

     The answer is not as complicated as one might imagine.

     You may be a gifted artist or mathematician, and your heart's dream may be to develop a new mathematical formula while working alongside Harvard professors. Or you may be a singer who hopes to play Madison Square Garden one day.

      For the mathematician, he should be working on such formulas now. And for the singer, he should be playing music almost anytime he can, whether in front of 2 people or 200.

     Because, soon, at  one point along the journey, an opportunity will meet your gifting and your heart's desire. It will astound you and scare you half to death. You may doubt all of your previous years of experience, but the questions will remain, "Are you ready? And do you really want this?"

     You will have your chance to shine. You don't have to worry about making that opportunity happen. These types of circumstances are rarely manufactured by our own schemes and plans. It may takes years to appear, but do not lose heart. It will happen and most likely when you least expect it, least care, and hopefully come when you're the most prepared.

Wisdom's Knocking:

Faithful with little. Faithful with much.

Image Isn't Everything

   Photo Credit: Daniella Hovsepian  

     I wish people in pictures sounded as good as they presented themselves in those pictures. 

     Let me explain that: It's always the best that we want people to see in us. And in pictures, nowadays, we strike the pose of smiling even if we were just in an argument with the our own thoughts or circumstances, seconds prior to the picture snapping.

     But perhaps the best in us according to our own eyesight is not as it seems or as strong as we'd like it to be. What if people see the beauty and strength in us, in other ways? I reckon that this is more true than not.

     When we look at a picture of ourselves, we tend to zone in on the area of perceived deficiency or lack of uniformity with the present day's standard of beauty. But I propose, that you look at yourself in the mirror at least once a day, and proclaim beauty and handsomeness to every area of who you are.

     It's incredibly important for you to already know the beauty and light that shines within you before anyone else, including yourself, tries to snuff it out, or puts limitations on it.

     The smile in your pictures shouldn't merely be an image or a facade of happiness, but instead, it should be a confirmation of the delight that you see in yourself and in others. 

Wisdom's Knocking:

You are fearfully and wonderfully made.

Blur, Blur, Focus.

     I’m in the process of trying to find my gaze. What am I suppose to be focusing on in my life right now? Where should I be exerting the majority of my energy. What makes my heart sing?

     Once before, it was diamond clear as to what I felt my calling was. And with that, it helped this artist to keep her path narrow and focused.

     But as time passed and curve balls came, somehow my heart’s focus got lost in the crowd.

     And with the temperament of an artist, I am inspired by a many art forms, outlets, and expressions, at any given time---Which can be dangerous. I can easily find myself drifting in multiple different paths without the true precision of walking intently and full of passion towards one artistic vocational statement.

     Could it be that following little passions lead to the fulfillment of the big passion?

     At the rate I’m going, one can only hope.

     Do I continue to go through the open doors presented to me, or do I exercise more discretion?

     Do I just take the ball because it was thrown to me, or do I head towards the sunflower fields of my dreams?...Or strawberry fields…Or…perhaps I need to be more intentional about picking and knowing the field of which I want to lay in…..And knowing which particular dream they hold.

     Dear God: Please help your daughter see more clearly… In all things. Amen.

Wisdom’s Knocking:

With God, follow your bliss.

Poetry

Photo Credit: Daniella Hovsepian

     I look forward to the day, when a beautiful man writes poetry about me. I’ve always dreamed about having one of those relationships where my man takes random photos of me dancing and sings me inspired poetry of our love.

     And I would make poetry for him, simply out of the overflow of my love. And I would hold his face with my two hands and thank God that I had the gift of sight to stare into his eyes for eternity.

     Those are things I think about when I think about poetry…

Wisdom’s Knocking:

You can live in a state of romance whether in or out of a relationship.

Pushing Buttons

     Photo Credit: Daniella Hovsepian

     It’s been a while since I’ve seen someone lose their cool and get uber defensive. Wait. Now that I think about it, that’s a lie. It was just that this particular incident seemed to stick out strongly, because it involved someone that I respect and care about deeply.

     Needless to say, when any of us are challenged in our current behavior patterns, we tend to get a little fidgety. Mostly, because I believe that certain behavior patterns  are rooted in a deep seated  emotion or event that has not been fully dealt with. And that emotion lives just enough below the surface to go unrecognized by strangers.

     Vulnerability is such a fragile and scary and brave attribute to acquire and maintain. One has to feel safe. One has to feel secure. One has to feel free in order to jump the cliff of vulnerability with another person.

     Today, without belittling and devaluing my own position and worth, I tried to remain a safe and loving place of refuge—a fair listening ear.

     The verdict is still out. Buttons were pushed. But as we’re both left standing. I will once again choose love.  And I won’t be afraid—rather I chose not to be afraid to be vulnerable once again.

Wisdom’s Knocking:

An argument doesn’t always have to end in division.

To Be Held

     Photo Credit: Victoria Clemmons

     Grrr. I hate making mistakes. Mostly, I hate being a repeat offender of the same crime. I'm in the process of planning something significant. But it's been a frustrating journey to say the least. But something within me still thinks that it's worth the fight. Do you have one of those scenarios in your life?

     Normally, this type of thing would be a breeze, but I find myself bumping clumsily into walls of challenge left and right. There's a key component missing for me, a partner in crime. I love working in the midst of a team. I love accomplishing something "together". But now, for this particular journey, it's just me.

     As much as I try to include others and ask for help along the way, I'm met with half-hearted interest and even less commitment.

     In this moment, I just want to be held.

     It may or may not be rational, but I honestly think that everything would be 110% better if I could simply be held by strong arms for an extended amount of time. Oh, and a couple of neck nuzzles wouldn't hurt either...

     ...Just to reaffirm to me, that everything is going to be alright.

Wisdom's Knocking:

No matter the difficulty you may be facing, know that Comfort is running towards you with an embrace.