Thursday, May 29, 2014

As Promised - A Video Post!

     So yesterday, after a full day of work, a couple of blisters and weathering heat and stairs that would make any triathlete cry, I decided to go straight into a video post just for you. Because I love you like that.

     I've missed you. And I hope this video will tie you over until I regain my life in 2015. I kid. I kid. Maybe...






And if the video is not showing up for you above, here's the link: http://youtu.be/4txdkvy3mkA






Wednesday, May 28, 2014

A Tribute

     My hope is that a legacy such as her's would become more and more prevalent among us all.

     I have been moved to feel, to question, to hope, to believe, and to live a full life of laughter and compassion by the shadow of her words.



Wisdom's Knocking:




Saturday, May 24, 2014

Love

     How will you know it's right, when it happens for you? They always say you'll "Just know". Well, I think I'm gaining some clues and insight...



Wisdom's Knocking:

"Love spurs us on to be the best and truest version of ourselves." 











Tuesday, May 20, 2014

Honest Friendships

     


     This art of belonging and choosing.

     Or rather choosing and belonging. It's an art.

     I recently came across this quote from Diane Keaton:

"A friend – that's a commitment. It's as close as you can get to family, and sometimes it's even closer. Friendship requires a lot of time. I don't have a lot of friends; I have acquaintances and people I think are charming, and I like to see them. I like to see Sarah Jessica Parker, I like to see Meryl Streep. I don't know them – I mean, I made a movie with them, once, and that's nice – but I know nothing about their lives."

     I'm realizing more and more that everyone, as amazing as they are and might be, will not be able to have the same access to your life, or to my life. Nurturing relationships is absolutely worth it and takes concentrated and intentional time, which we know is the most precious commodity of all. And you are one person with the same 24 hours in a day as every one else and can only successfully contribute to a certain amount of relationships.

     A few weeks ago I asked one of my best friend's to answer these questions about myself:


     Are there any areas of my life that you find off-putting?

Hmm. I'm really searching for something now and I think a lot of people (myself included) suffer from this... but maybe your schedule? Between the shows/work and ministry related duties, it's hard to see you/talk to you. And I completely realize that you are not a phone person so texting is great (neither am I so this is why we are friends) but maybe that is harder for some folks who like to talk in person or on the phone?


     What are ways I could be a better friend?

Pick up the phone! j/k...kind of ;)


     Which of my character traits will be a blessing to my future spouse?

Your empathy, your generosity, your prayerfulness, your trust in God, your beauty (in and out), your strength, your vulnerability! 


     Which of my character traits will be burden to my future spouse?

Maybe all the traits that I just listed as a blessing? As long as your traits are yoked with someone who is capable of recognizing those as blessings. I know you desire to have a husband who is able to lead your family (and that includes you), and I also know that you have natural leadership qualities. But I think finding the right balance will be key in this area especially as you help him grow as the spiritual head of your family.


+++++++


     I love honest friendships.

     There's freedom in theses safe spaces of life with the people we call friends.

     The freedom to be fully yourself, and the freedom to grow. #priceless

     Love thrives here.






Wisdom's Knocking:

"There's no legacy as rich as honesty."

- William Shakespeare, "All's Well That Ends Well"





Thursday, May 15, 2014

When You Feel Rude

     


     We have this restaurant in my hometown that my family and I love going to. But in recent years, they've hired a new hostess. Well, hostess, is a bit of a generous word. This chick couldn't be bothered with you once you enter her premises.

     I honestly have to brace myself every time I order food from this establishment, because I literally feel the urge to wrap my hands firmly around her neck wrists and tell her to just STOP IT.

     But I don't.

     And I calmly smile and pay her for being mean to me.

     One of my life messages that I love preaching about centers around the Kindness of Christ. And how we have the honor in participating and perpetuating this kindness everywhere we go. Even and especially to rude people.

     But it's no cake walk for me either. Rude people get on my nerves too.

     But I've learned to pray to see people not merely with my eyes, but through the eyes of Jesus. And that has made all the difference these last few years.

     I've found that 2 key things seem to make a person rude: 

     1. Tiredness

    2. Disappointment

    But mostly, disappointment.

    When you're tired, physically and emotionally, you simply couldn't be bothered with any one else's emotions, because you're so exhausted and wrapped up in your own. Plus, you're too tired to see that you've offended someone or not paid attention to the details. In our tired state, we tend to overlook things and become careless.

     But when we've been disappointed by life, by family, by dreams, by someone not following through on their word, or showing up on time to work for the next shift when they knew you had plans, we get heated and angry and rude.

     But it's interesting how rudeness becomes viral. Because you then take out your frustrations on unsuspecting civilians that know nothing of your past or your current dilemma/drama. Breeding inward contempt within yourself and among potential friends that you have now made enemies.

     However in these moments, don't let disappointment rule you.

     What is the one thing that can displace disappointment?

     Love.

     With that said, never ever ever forget that you are loved by God. And secondly, go visit the one person you know that loves and esteems you, so you can be reminded of the good things in life.

     Know that life doesn't end with disappointment, but there is hope and joy to be had and to be lived out, here and now. 

     And embrace Romans 8:28 afresh.

And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.

     Rudeness is an ugly habit that can be broken.

     And it starts with our own hearts.

     I could have put my dear sweet hostess in a headlock and made her apologize, but instead, I softened my own heart by choosing to acknowledge there is something deeper going on with her, and her rudeness is just the outer symptom. She, even in her current state, is worthy of compassion and love.

     And with that, I know that God is faithful to not only meet her heart, but mine as well as I choose to grow in humility and kindness.

     Whereas rudeness tries to exercise false power. Kindness is a true and lasting force.

     Rudeness repels and leaves one isolated and estranged. When in our heart of hearts, all we are wanting and waiting for is for someone to truly care, ask us what's wrong, and hear us out.

     But, Kindness invites and solidifies all those that are connected to it. Creating a vibrant atmosphere of life and love, and leaving the beholder and bestower of such kindness more attractive and more steadfast because of it.




Wisdom's Knocking:

"Rudeness is the weak man's imitation of strength."

- Eric Hoffer




Monday, May 12, 2014

Guest Post: "Know You, Love You, and Be You"

     I started dating late in life. I joke I had the understanding of a 16 year old but a body of
a 25 year old. Needless to say I learned a hard lesson on how nothing good happens
after midnight. I got wrapped in a relationship without commitment and once a soul tie
was made, I lost “me” along the way. It's been a long journey that I'm still walking out
but who I am today is more gracious, loving and fearless because I've allowed myself
the grace to accept all the good, the bad and ugly.




     Here's some nuggets I've learned along my “34 year” way.

     Know you, Be you and Love you.

     You have to know who you are before you can know who you are in a relationship.
You have to be you in all your quirkiness and give them the permission to love you
just as you are. You have to truly love yourself with all your junk knowing you are a
beautiful work in progress. Being authentic with yourself gives you a healthy ability to
grow and just BE in a relationship. If you like doors to be opened don't apologize for
it, just give them grace to learn but stand your ground. If hanging with your bros is
important then stay true to that while respecting the time and needs of your girl. I am
a true believer in making what's important to them important to you but make sure you
don't lose “you” along the way. Having self-respect is one of the greatest gifts you can
give yourself and it starts with loving your beautiful, messy, honest, (sometimes) crazy,
adorable, loveable self.

    Shame is a prison but you have the keys.

     If you have gone places in the past that has brought you shame, Let It Go! Shame is
an awful thing that paralysis you from your potential. It makes you seem small when
really you are strong, able, vivacious and free. Shame defines you as “less than”,
Grace defines you with respect, honor, and worth. What you do might shape you but
it doesn't define you. Don't allow shame to steal a minute, a day, a year of your life.
Acceptance of what was and the ability to set it free will give you grace to lift up your
head in dignity and receive the love that is for you. No good comes from shame.

     What is for you will not pass you by.

     I have been trapped by fear that “IT” may never come unless I work at “it” and make
“it” happen. If I pray a little harder, dream a little bigger, focus more intently it will
suddenly manifest. But as cliché as it sounds when you least expect it, that is when
it happens. Shifting your attention off the thing is not only healthy but helpful. I think
when we want something so bad we send out this needy energy that can come across
as “too much” and unattractive. You might not say I'm desperate with your words but
it's oozing from your very being. The best way to combat “desperato-ville” is to take
your energy off “when will it come” and put it on “who you will be when it does”. I truly
believe that the right (un-perfect) but perfect for you person will come and the best
is to rest in that fact. Find new hobbies, live full adventures, make memories with the
best human beings you've surrounded yourself with and when your person comes they
will be a beautiful addition to a full life that already exist.

     You are enough. You're growing, learning, being and trusting. You are in the right
place. Shake off what was and set your soul free. Lift up your eyes and hold on to
hope. It will happen. Don't sweat it, control it, fear it or force it. Rest in the fact it WILL
come to pass and be okay that there is nothing you can do about it.


###


     Kristen Joy Hilyard is a Texas based designer that over the last few years has stepped into her role as a life stylist expert. Through life experience, schooling, creativity, intuition and culture she has grown as an artist and recently launched her business 33Perspective

    33Perspective marries her passion for design with her desire to impact pertinent issues related to violence, isolation, and re-imagining one’s life. Each of her pieces are hand design and crafted with intention. 

     Whether stamped, beaded, sculpted or found, they are inspired with herself and others in mind. Her varied experience and influence in the entertainment industry includes the lead role in a short independent film, featured in local and national commercials, and several news segments on Fox News, Great Day Houston, Mirror Mirror, and as a co-host on a political talk show on CNN 650 Radio News. 

     Bohemian in style she frequently sports a sparkle headband with her blonde beach waves and will break out in song at any moment of the day. Spontaneous dancing usually follows…if you are lucky enough to be in her proximity, you will find yourself somewhere in her twirl. Her desire is to connect with the human spirit, and listen and decipher the intentions and hearts of all who visit her future talk show.



You can find out more about Kristen Hilyard here:  http://www.kristenjoy.com/








Thursday, May 08, 2014

Pretty Words

     I'm a bit of a Pinterest fanatic. With that said, I wanted to share with you some of my current favorite quote "pins" for the month of May:










You can find more of my quote pins here: http://www.pinterest.com/puerilityvol1/with-words/

Tuesday, May 06, 2014

My Romantic Hopes

   




     This past week, it's been hard to believe for my own happily ever after.

     Not only has it been difficult, but any time I start sharing about where my heart is regarding romance, I start to get hot all over--not the good kind. And my upper lip starts to gently quiver, and my throat starts to get awkwardly tight.

     In an effort to not give myself away, I try to talk slower and with clarity. But the slowness only gives my eyes a chance to get properly watery--

     And then I just have to shut it down--the conversation about my romance, and the waiting, and the expectation these past 15 years--nope, it's too much.

     "They said if I would wait as if I was not expecting anything to happen, you would arrive..." {excerpt from "Where Are You?" by Rachel Gunn}

     And then well meaning people, family, the random co-worker, simply give their best shot at encouragement.

     This could be your year. Don't look for perfection--he could be right under your nose, perhaps even a 'diamond in the rough'.

     And how is that exactly encouraging? I simply want him in my arms. Not in the future or presented as a project of which I have the privilege of putting in more work than the average girl.

     So what do I do when I feel completely hopeless about my romantic future?

     First things first. I go to the source of hope:

"May the God of your hope so fill with you all joy and peace in believing (through the experience of your faith), that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound and be overflowing (bubbling over) with hope." -- Romans 15:13 (Amplified translation)

     I can't muster up fake joy and hope at this stage of the game, let alone the real thing--and I don't have to.

     I'm quite aware of when my 'positive thinking' ends, and when God's supernatural hope and joy begins. And I ask Him in prayer to meet me, where I lack full joy, peace, and hope.

     Meanwhile, my frustrations, my resentments, my fears may flare up, but I know that they are like dry brush, ready to be consumed by the fire of hope and love by an incredible God in any given moment.

     I found myself this weekend, on a retreat with God. I wanted to hide from Him. Put the fig leaves on, like Adam and Eve. But He's too clever for that. He's my one weakness.

     And at this retreat center, they had a charming gift shop.

     Why did I buy a book titled, "Praying for Your Future Husband"?

     Well, I did.

     When I first saw the book, I wanted to make fun of it. Simply because of the pain in my own heart.

     I had been praying for my future children since I was 15 years old, and I started praying for my future husband off and on since the age of 18.

     But then I skimmed the book casually.

"The place to start praying for your future husband is in the garden of his heart. What do you want to be growing there when you meet him?"...

     CUT TO:  Me at the cash register buying this book.

     So what the target audience for this book is teenage girls. The two women authors were dropping wisdom bombs, and I wanted in on the action.

     Even though it was painful going back into this territory, I knew it wasn't my own dead hope spurring this on, but the hope that God had placed in me.

     Mix me devouring that book in a matter of a few days and my recent binge on British costume period dramas ("Lark Rise to Candleford"!), I've once again stumbled across the those things that truly make my heart happy.

     I'm believing once again for a dashing British man, full of hotness, humor, passion for Jesus, and culinary skills for days. Or simply perhaps, the most amazing man that God could have ever fashioned for me in an unexpected package...But a British accent never hurt nobody.

     I'm not giving up on my romantic hopes, and don't you dare give up on yours.



Wisdom's Knocking:

"May the God of your hope so fill with you all joy and peace in believing 
(through the experience of your faith), that by the power of the Holy Spirit 
you may abound and be overflowing (bubbling over) with hope." 

-- Romans 15:13 (Amplified translation)