A Coughing Giant

     

Photo Credit: Lauren Evans

     I know the holiday season has come to an abrupt hault, but the sentiments of the season are still lingering with me. This past holiday season I noticed more than ever before the weight of time and how precious it truly is. I wanted to bundle my precious mom and dad up in a blanket and never let them go. I wanted certain things to just freeze frame for just a bit. Everything was moving too fast for me. It felt like the future, past, and present were spinning like a tornado in my head. And there seemed to be no end in sight.

     We were all so weak this holiday season.

     I was battling a weird case of anxiety and a bad cold, mom was sick too, and my strong dad had pneumonia.

     The cruel reminder of this imperfect state of things was dad's constant coughing.

     You know the type of cough I'm talking about, it's just painful to hear because there's an odd amount of bass in it.

     When my dad got to the doctors's prior to being diagnosed, the doctor couldn't believe that my dad was standing and talking to him, the pneumonia was on that level. The doctor gave him some super-pack meds about a week and a half before Christmas and the recovery was in full swing come Christmas, but the cough was still lingering.

     That cough was like a taunting demon.

     And in the midst I felt so vulnerable and helpless, which is not my usual M.O. -- the helpless part in particular.

     I've noticed in this season of breaking through the chains of anxiety and pain, I've had to re-learn the simplest of things once again. That God exists. That God is love. That God is for me and not against me.

     Surprisingly enough, I've not yet mastered those strong truths just yet, but minute by minute they are beginning to resurface in the atoms of my body.

     But I'm praying for my spirit to rise up like David, like when he rose up, confronted, and defeated the giant Goliath.

     So last night, I went to my parent's house and we all prayed as a family. I laid my hands on my dad and prayed for healing and a restful night's sleep. But in actuality, I think I was actually praying for myself.

      My dad is on the way to the doctor's now with mom, his cough has persisted. I'm a little nervous and I do feel tension rising in my body, but amidst it all, I do feel peace.

     Giants taunt, but do not always have to get the last word, nor the win.

     I'm praying for you today. That whatever giant you are facing or wrestling with that you would feel strengthened and encouraged unto victory. You already have a Champion in your corner.

     Facing giants is never an easy task, often impossible. But with God, all things are possible.

Wisdom's Knocking:

“Every step was a victory. He had to remember that.”
 ― George Saunders, Tenth of December