I'm an Airport Celebrity. It Can Happen to You

     Photo Credit: Victoria Clemmons

     A couple weeks back, I did something that I've never done before. It was exhilarating. And yes, I had a sweat mustache while doing it. At the time, my thoughts were racing. But there was no turning back.

     Compounded with the pressure of time, I also had the intent stares from a crowd of people burning a hole through my entire being.

     What was this event, you ask? Oh, I just simply boarded a plane...

     Digital style.

     Boom.

     Oh, you don't know what that means?

     No boarding pass, baby. Yeah, I do my part to help the planet.

     Instead of going through airport security with a paper boarding pass, which is the standard, when reaching airport security I simply whipped out my iPhone, which had a fancy dancy coded hieroglyphic on its screen. That special hieroglyphic, of which I received 24 hours before I actually even stepped foot into the airport, translated into my official boarding pass and allowed me to enter airport security, walk straight to my gate, and board my flight.

     So when I arrived at the security check point--after the woman that struggled to hand over her semi-soggy boarding pass (Due to her sweaty palms and painful multitasking of holding an obscene amount of luggage) I was nervous.

     I had never done this before. If this went wrong or delayed the disgruntled passengers behind me, there could have been an airport scene.

     So when I told the airline security checkpoint person that I had a digital boarding pass, she looked confused. All eyes were on me. I was starting to sweat a little.The passengers eyes behind me were burning the back of my neck.

     But then, the airline security person looked at me and said, "Oh, you get to scan it right here." And in that moment, I immediately recognized a small electronic scanner, that I could have sworn just appeared out of no where. Needless to say, I was feeling very Bourne Identity up in that piece.

     And then...as if in slow motion, I digitally scanned my boarding pass from my iPhone. I was given the green light. I could feel the wide-eyes of the audience behind me. And with a little bit of sweat above my upper lip, I just walked through towards my gate like a rockstar.

Wisdom's Knocking:

Don't be afraid to try something new.

Mixed Signals = No Signal

     

     Okay. So apparently, I don't always follow my own advice and my own words of wisdom. It's one thing to know the right thing to do or say. It's a whole notha ballgame to actually do those things.

     So if you've been following my blog at all this year, you may have picked up on my coded language as I've been describing my woes and angst with the opposite sex. To give you a bit more context to my monologue, it all had to do with battling it out with a few guy friends of mine.

     The battle rested on the grounds of mixed signals. That fact remained, that I wasn't quite sure if they were pursuing me romantically or simply just trying to be extra friendly, whatever that means. And yes,  my heart was open to the possibility of romance with these particular fellas, unbeknownst to them.

     In the past few years, I've let go of a majority of my male friendships, because I was intentionally trying to make emotional space for my boo to come on the scene. But then, before I knew it, I was once again in the mix of some amazing guy friends. And that's when things began to get a little blurry.

     I cannot tell you how many times, I've given advice to a conflicted lady friend who couldn't read the actions of her trusted guy friend. To put it simply, I would just tell them: "When a guy is wanting and ready to pursue you, he will let you know." So until then, mixed signals, no matter how strong or possibly romantic they may seem, equals no signal for romance. Plus, you want a man that's clear and intentional anyway. A much more positive indication of things to come.

     Now, if you're stuck with one of those guy friends that has horrible boundaries and loves to cuddle you, but not date you. You need to woman up and create healthy boundaries in that friendship that should have been there in the first place. Or else, your heart will be trampled.

     So what have I re-learned thus far, in 2011? Mixed signals = no signals. And furthermore, I should follow my own advice.

Wisdom's Knocking:

Don't just talk the talk. Walk the talk.

Where Have I Been?

     I've been lagging on my blog posts! But alas, I'm back in the game. There's been so much going on. I cannot wait to update you on such things as: "I'm an Airport Celebrity. It Can Happen to You" and "I'm Obsessed with My Nieces!"

     But my next blog post will be: "Mixed Signals = No Signal".

     So let's get this party started again!

Wisdom's Knocking:

In the best of times and in the worst of times, keep on truckin'.

Disliked

   Photo Credit: Lindsay Coleman  

     Have you ever been in the dilemma of 2 feuding friends? And yet, you yourself, have no beef with either party. So you are in some weird limbo middle area between the 2 feuding friends. Ugh.

     How do you fully handle this situation with grace and honor to both parties involved? It's such an awkward place to stand in one's friendship. You don't want to take a side, yet you sympathize with both parties in the feud. Do you call an intervention? Or just wait until things really blow up?

     I have such a heart for sincere communication, a forgiving heart, and the art of listening rather than talking in an argument. But in my particular case (As the friend in the "Middle"), it doesn't look like either party is ready to talk it out yet.

     So I get to tip-toe around subjects that involve the other friend while talking to the opposing friend. It's a bit exhausting and nerve racking.

     But then I think, why am I taking this burden as my own? But then I think, this feud is somehow a reflection on my own capacity to choose loving and mature friends. I guess I feel like I failed in a way. The people that I chose to love in friendship, are choosing not to love one another.

     But of course, I cannot take responsibility for someone else's actions and motives, but it still affects my heart.

     I just hope that in the end, what was construed and meant for evil would be turned around for great good. And hopefully I'll be retiring my awkward-person-in-the-middle-friendship seat--sooner rather than later.

Wisdom's Knocking:

Most of the time, we are far more similar than we are different.

Awake

Photo Credit: Lindsay Coleman

With you I feel safe
Awake with Freedom

With you I feel loved
With the power and epic of Eden

With you I feel known
Furthering my stories of legacy in time

With you I feel joy
Nurturing my soul to sing songs in rhyme

With you I feel seen
Undoubtedly beautiful and wholly redeemed.

For you are my rising shine
The Son of constant light
And I breathe in your stars
Without the presence of a darkened night.

Wisdom's Knocking:

"I am The Way, The Truth, and The Life" -- Jesus

I Don't Like Sushi

Photo Credit: Lindsay Coleman

     I will unashamedly tell you this information: No, I do not like sushi.

     It's taken me a while to say that short sentence with such confidence. I mean, living in California, it seems to be the "in" thing to do. You know, to go out with a group of your grown-up friends, talk about the latest iPhone app and recent independent movies over a sweet plate of sushi.  But I just couldn't bring myself to do it. And I felt like I was breaking people's hearts when I told them that I wasn't into sushi.

     How could I truly be an artist and a city dweller without loving sushi? But here I am, some sort of walking contradiction. Wouldn't be the first or the last time.

     Oh, but for the record, I do not count a "California Roll" as real sushi. The facade of a name gives it away. 

     All to say, it is hard to go against the grain, to truly find steady footing in the soil that you've been given, while a steady stream of culture is constantly telling us how to think, speak, and be. And sometimes that culture could just be the group of friends and community that currently surrounds us.

Wisdom's Knocking:

Be a leader, not just a follower.

Who Are You in "Winnie the Pooh"?

Photo Credit: Kaitlyn Blosser

     

     This question stems from the fact that I've been surrounded by a few Eeyores lately. You know, Eeyore from Winnie the Pooh? He's the donkey that's always depressed about something. His whole demeanor is always in this sad disposition, even when he's trying to be happy.

     Do you know some Eeyores out there? Or maybe you're the Eeyore in your group? I mean chances are, if you can't locate the Eeyore in your group of friends, you're it.  Sorry. I do it because I care.

     Your personality affects an atmosphere. And may be the reason you attract or repel friends.

     And what if you are an Eeyore? Will you ever get out of your slump? I'm hopeful for you, but only time will tell. You have to work doubly hard to feel at rest and at peace with yourself don't you? But once you get to that place of rest and peace, the more jovial side of your personality begins to shine.

     Perhaps you've had Eeyore tendencies for as long as you can remember. (Note: No one wants to be around a party pooper or an atmosphere drainer.) But don't let that deter you. Take it one day at a time, and choose to enjoy the little things. Be thankful Now. Don't wait to be happy.

     To my fellow Eeyores out there, I have mad love for you, really I do--Although sometimes you GET ON MY NERVES, but mostly you help me grow in Patience. See, that was me being Thankful Now, and not waiting to be happy later, when I'm no longer surrounded by Eeyores.

:::

     And remember, admitting you have Eeyore type tendencies, is the first step to recovery. You don't have to stay in that place.

Wisdom's Knocking:

Be thankful now. Don't wait to be happy.

Thank You, Friends

     Photo Credit: Denise Valle

     Thank you to my lovely friends that humor me. Wait, that's not the word I wanted to use...More like oblige me...or honor me by taking the time to read my silly blog.

     It's makes me feel loved.

Wisdom's Knocking:

Validation is an amazing encourager.

Today...

     Handmade Jewelry By: Candace Westbrook

I seriously just bought something because of it's label. It was pure advertising and marketing at it's best. I held this item in my hand, and asked myself if I really needed this thing? We already know the answer to this. No, I didn't need it.

     But then again, the label made me smile.

     So I held this item in my hand for a few more seconds. And thought, "Ah, what the heck." And I succumbed to my humor organ, yes, my heart.

     What was the label on this item? I know your dying to know.

     It simply said, "Black & Beautiful".

     And I simply said, "Yes."

     And no, this product wasn't a "Relaxer" (That's a "Straight Perm" for all you non-Black folk out there), which made it even better. It was a product that could be used by almost anyone. Chances are, you may have used this type of product before, but perhaps not this brand with it's fancy label.

Wisdom's Knocking:

Take the time to appreciate your own natural beauty.

Community

     Photo Credit: Ashley Johnson

     No not the show, although it's definitely growing on me. I was just thinking about the importance of community this week.

     Like how important it is to find your tribe, your entourage.

     But as it is with most close knit communities, it takes time. It takes a great deal of time to gain history with the people around you.

     My generation and city thrive on being transient, traveling from one place to another, fulfilling our vagabond desires and passions of curiosity.

     But in all our adventures, we can miss the simplicity of authentic community. We go out of our way to create language and Facebook connections to make it appear as though we have a close knit tribe of some sort. But in actuality we are still lonely. We are desiring to share our lives on a deeper level, with someone with much closer proximity.

     And then I think of how I grew up. I lived in the same city during my childhood and teen years. I went to the same school from kindergarten to my senior year in high school with a majority of the same kids. We have history. And a unique sense of community that grounds us.

     As much as you and I try to create community wherever we go, there are just some things that will never change. You can't microwave a process that's meant to be in an oven. You'll come up with something soggy, half-cooked, and ultimately unsatisfying.

     In order to gain the riches of true community, a true entourage, you have to be willing to put in the time, to gain real history, to know the same stories, to get frustrated but choose to stay anyway because you know it's worth it.

     But as long as we keep running, without roots...we'll just keep running....without roots.

Wisdom's Knocking:

Life is better shared.

First Impressions

     Photo Credit: Nicole LeBoeuf

     I've said it before and I'll say it again, first impressions are no joking matter. Trust that gut instinct that you feel within the first 10 minutes of meeting a person for the first time.

     Whether you felt comfortable, safe, threatened, annoyed, loved, appreciated, understood...These are all things that are sure to come up eventually in the course of your friendship or relationship with a person.

     Not to say that you can't work through the more difficult and annoying traits. I'm just saying, be aware of what you're getting into.

     And pray for grace and wisdom for those scenarios full of misunderstanding, conflict, or the ever-so-complicated smothering.

Wisdom's Knocking:

First Impressions last forever.

What Should I Read Next?

Photo Credit: 42 Frenzy Photography

     I'm getting into one of my moods....One of my reading moods. I think it may take over my entire summer. What are some good books you can recommend to me? And give me your case as to why I should read them...

Wisdom's Knocking:

Use it or lose it.

Loving What You Do, Even When Others Could Care Less

     Photo Credit: Yajaira Reynolds

     Have you spent time doing at least two things that you love this week? Not because it was the "It" thing to do, or because every hipster is talking about it, or because the person you're interested in does it.

     Have you done two things this week that simply make your heart happy?

     It's never too late to reconnect with the uniqueness of who you are. And sure, other people may bask in the same interests, but I can almost guarantee that they are not sharing the same body as you.

     I realized this week, that I had been so focused on what I didn't have that I almost forgot about the things that I do have and love to do.

     And if I love to do these particular things already, I don't have to wait around for someone to validate them as significant and important. They are already important and special to me.

Wisdom's Knocking:

Have the courage to do what you love.

Define My Dance

     Photo Credit: Anthony Njoku

     The dictionary describes dancing as:

-Verb (used without object) 

1. to move one's feet or body, or both, rhythmically in a pattern of steps, especially to the accompaniment of music. 

2. to leap, skip, etc., as from excitement or emotion; move nimbly or quickly: to dance with joy. 

3. to bob up and down: The toy sailboats danced on the pond.
Credit: www.dictionary.com

     Sometimes I just sit and deconstruct the most random things. Like how we move our bodies to a sound frequency. And it makes us happy. What. Really. So strange and so lovely.

     That is all.

Wisdom's Knocking:

Dance like nobody's watching.

Diego, Are You Out There?

     Photo Credit: Ashley Johnson

     For those of you that know me, you know how significant that name is to me. And with that said, I felt impelled to simply yell it out across the internet waves.

     It's like my message in a bottle.

Wisdom's Knocking:

Sometimes, someone is just waiting for you to call on their name.

Weeping, Sun, Bloom

 
     Why does it take something bitter to happen for us to truly appreciate the sweet. I often wonder about the rainy seasons of our lives, and how fruit is produced because of it.

     I wish there was an easier way to be pulled out of the pain. But instead, we are enabled and strengthened to walk through it.

     As I prayed last night for friends, family members, and myself, I wept and wept and wept. So many things seemed unfair and unjust. So many equations to be figured out, with no immediate solutions.

     And as I sat in the midst of discouragement, I asked for God's perspective. I asked for His strength. I went to bed feeling cranky and unresolved.

     But when I woke up, something happened.

     The weight was lifted. And not by my own doing or will power, but by the kind intentions of His will.

      And I began a new day.

Artwork By: Lindsay Coleman

Wisdom's Knocking:

April showers bring May flowers.

I Like to Whisper

     Photo Credit: Ashley Johnson

     I realize more and more that I do love expressing myself in the written word. I miss my consistent position behind the camera and directing, but it served the same purpose as my writing:

The art of observing.

     Now before you think I've completely abandoned my film making adventures and desires, that's not the case at all. In fact, I think they've been gaining momentum and perspective all the while.

     You know those weird folks that claim that they are introvert/extroverts? Yeah, well that's me. I realize that I'm shy, yet outspoken.  I'm friendly and love being around people, but I also love my me-time and simply driving through the countryside.

     I'd rather stay behind the scenes, than in front of a crowd or camera. But I can feel comfortable in both settings.

     As much as I like to tell you all my business on this blog, I also love my privacy. And granted, I don't tell you everything.  But I do share quite a bit. And yes, it's based on my real current life circumstances. But you get to try to put the pieces together.

     Because sometimes I like to shout, and other times, I like to whisper.

Wisdom's Knocking:

Be sure to nurture the introvert and extrovert in you.