Tuesday, September 09, 2008

Gettin Back

There's an upswing happening in our midst. It shall be excellent. He is that good.

And how do we perceive ourselves? Are we really who we believe we are? Meaning, is that how people see us?...Is our self perception skewed. Do we constantly say we are about love, compassion, and mercy but have an attitude as hot as a volcano.

Is there a disconnect in what we are choosing to believe about ourselves and what is truly ourselves. I'm going to be bold and say yes.

And praise God we don't always get what we feel we deserve. Especially in the timeframe that we think we deserve that....this and the other.

Because as Zig Ziglar has stated (and one of my all time favorite quotes): "What you get by achieving your goals is not as important as what you become by achieving your goals."

The heart. Who we are. The essence of us. Even more important than the goal. The destination. The dream. Because somewhere intertwined within the dream is us.

Am I still me without the achievement of "great" things?

Why yes. Yes indeed.

It's interesting to me that Jesus does not need our service or our gifts. Those are not the things that He died for. He simply died for us. The rest is beautiful icing.

So as the good and the great begin to greet us, let us never forget that we are not the things that we gather or those things we are able to do or achieve. We are much more profound and much more beautiful than that. We were loved and have the opportunity to be partakers of love in some way, each and every day.

We 'were' and are loved.

Yes, that is something I am trying to understand and grasp everyday.

Monday, September 01, 2008

Like Jeopardy

You know that music that plays on the game show Jeopardy. Not the theme music, but the music that is played around the final round. It's this fluid yet monotonous sort of jingle.

Well, that's what it feels like in this time and space. And secondly, I can't believe it's already September.

I must let you know something.

It's appropriate that we will be entering fall in the next few weeks. Because I feel as if I have let all my own dreams and desires "fall"....die so to speak. And no, no, I don't want you to feel pity or sorry for me. Maybe just hug me real tight the next time you see me. It's just that something is lingering in the atmosphere. It's bugging me a bit. I feel this sense of "looming". I know, not trying to get all apocalypto on you, but I'm just trying to be honest. I don't feel this "looming" for myself so much as I do for the world. Weird. I know.

There is such a hunger for hope right now. Heck, I'm trying to regain it myself. And in this instance, it's so hard to see that I am loved by Him. Not that I don't think He is capable of love, it's just I'm having a hard time receiving it and believing it fully in this current wave of emotion.

That theme music is playing and at the same time this weird sort of drum countdown.

I'm still waiting for the new beginning. I'm still waiting for the more.